the prison walls...

walls: (as a verb, from dictionary.reference.com)

* to enclose, shut off, divide, protect, border, etc...

* to seal or entomb (someone or something) within a wall

walls keep out the cold and rain, keep the light at bay and the hum of life is dulled to a pur in this place of solece. walls secure our countries and kingdom from predators and onlookers, alike. provided a way in and out, the wall appears to provide strength and confidence, a respit for peace on long, weary days.... free to come and go... until the wall becomes the crutch, the hiding place, no longer a place of renewal and communion with Him...

the wall is no longer there to temporary protect from the pains of life, but brick by brick our shield has now imprisoned our heart....

what happens when we refuse to tear down the stones and live in His freedom? when we no longer step outside the doors in our wall and our role in His Body is empty and dying?

the way God designed our bodies is a model for understanding our lives together as a church: every part dependent on every other part, the parts we mention and the parts we don't, the parts we see and the parts we don't. if one part hurts, every other part is involved in the hurt, and in the healing. if one part flourishes, every other part enters into the exuberance. 1 Corinthians 12.25-26 (MSG)

the wall in theory was excellent defense: using the hurled stones of pain, anger, loss, betrayal and creating the barricade with which to kneel behind, where the healing from Him could begin....

as the wall hardened steadfast strong, an eery pride joins in and the mission to go it alone with no need for others creeps along, forgeting His command... simple safeguard for the heart, right? love hurts deep and long, pouring it out over and over without allowing His love to refill and flow through brings drought and famine. going it alone behind the walls breeds dullness, when love runs dry we forget the Master's command

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples--when they see the love you have for each other." John 13.34-35 (MSG)

selfish wants to buffer love and fellowship with thick walls.... but then how will they see Him?!

you use steel to sharpen steel,and one friend sharpens another.proverbs 27.17

must chose-- His path: to love, sacrifice, endless compassion.... a growing love affair with the original Lover of our soul... OR the fortress of walls: emptiness, aching lonliness, separation and hardening...

by His Spirit the stones of the armament crumble bit by bit... as Light exposes our hurts, our fears...the wombly first steps to serve, to love, to live life bare and unearthed without walls

faith and trust the only real Strength needed, all that will save the soul....

you are Christ's body--that's who you are! you must never forget this. only as you accept your part of that body does your "part" mean anything. 1 Corinthians 12.27

only when the wall breaks apart can His will truly be done...

as i step out, i have failed and pulled back, ducked behind the barrier of my heart....it's quiet, i'm alone and the fear blurs my vision of Him

i stand up, knock away more stones by His beautiful grace, i will not lose my joy for prideful disobedience....

heart cries out "make me more like you" and His courage to love, to serve, to host, to dream streams through my heart

i still fail, sometimes i cower, scrabble towards the walls, but stopping short, on bended knee and arms lifted heavenward.... i believe, i know He is greater than all the pain, the hurts, the betrayals, my sins

His love is abundant and fresh, radiant sweet

if we desire to be like Him, to be the Voice of love to the grotesque blackness of the world, be the hands He uses to break the chains of sin by reaching out, out of our comfortable places, the prison walls must come down

He is greater, marvelous, glorious and bigger than my inadequecy

make us like you, Oh Lord!!! take me where you need me, break my heart for your Kingdom's calling

is He calling you to leave your fortress and trust that He will sustain you heart?

catchin' up....

since i've been a tad inconsistent with my blogging for the last month (sorry, again...), there is a ton to catch up on, like....

....did i tell you that we had a baby squirrel?! yes, we did... past tense.... he had such a wonderful time playing with all the kiddos and jumping from drape to drape, eating hand-picked acorns and being the center of attention at 3rd grade show-n-tell, he (his name is Bandit) just laid down and fell into an eternal sleep dreaming of tall trees and yummy nuts from now 'til forever.... yep, he croaked passed away just days before we were to release him back into the wild back yard. it was actually very sad for our posse and my Man was conveniently out of town on business during the whole drama, leaving Mama here to handle the tragedy alone.... sorry if my sarsacm is dripping all over your screen right now, just wipe it off and find your happy place in looking at this adorable picture of Bandit and lil' Girlie

....i had an amazing 3 days soaking up the wisdom of Godly women at our church's womans conference! A.M.A.Z.I.N.G.!! the presence of the Lord so sweet and deep.... renewal that was much needed, insight that i had been seeking, dreams being revealed, and such a blast spending this time with my sister (in-law) M..... big God-sized dreams that seem impossible to me, but with God working through and the power of His Holy Spirit, nothing is too big for my God! can i get an AMEN?!! thanks :)

....there was a birthday in the house!!! our baby Girlie is now the big 9!! how did that happen?! she's 9, really?! aside from my denial that she's becoming a beautiful young girl and not my lil' preschooler anymore, it was a great week of celebration. yes, i said week long celebration: the family party on the 3rd, mini-celebration just our Posse on her actually birthday on the 5th and finally her friends came over for an evening that following weekend. wow, i'm tired all over again just typing that!

my sweet girl, Mama thinks the universe of your heart and soul! your eyes see right to someone's heart and your compassion is unmeasured. i love your delight in the Lord, how your voice rings sweet as you recite verses to me, God's secrets written on your heart...simply gorgeous is all of you, inside and out!

...and how could i forget the endless days of football practice and games for the ever-growing eldest, 'P'.... his dedication and perservance and hard-work this first jr. high season is stunning and inspiring to me. this was a lesson in preparation without much opportunity to perform....82 boys on the 7th grade team, so no one got to truly show their full potential, frustrating is the ache during games, but God is good and faithful and 'P' demonstrated great skill on defense (inside linebacker!) and he went uninjuried (yay!)....

and as soon as the season was finished the very next week began basketball tryouts (this is our sport, baby!!)...50 some odd 7th grade boys graced the court to compete for the coveted 18 spots. after a week long tryout, our awesome young man MADE THE TEAM!! so proud, excited, humbled, thrilled, anxious.... man i love you, kid!

....we went pumpkin hunting!!! no, this picture isn't from our evening at the pumpkin patch (those pictures may or may not ever grace the screen) but it was a superfabulous evening of corn mazes, corn boxes (think sand box, but with corn kennels instead!! it was great!), horse back riding, hay rides, feeding goats & sheep, bottle feeding a calf and a wonderful time around a bonfire roasting turkey dogs and marshmellows.but this picture is at a local farmers market and was however the perfect place to buy some perfectly orange pumpkins to puncuate our front porch...and for only $13 we walked out of there with 6 pumpkins and some "baby" princess punk'ins

'K' felt the need to put all the "baby" or small (we've been doing a lot of home preschooling about tall/short, big/small, etc.... so he's a little obsessed with grouping right now) punk'ins together or with a "mommy" pumpkin. you're so stinkin' cute Big 'K'!!!

that is most definitely NOT everything that's been happening in these parts, and i've had a bajillion and one thoughts and ponderings floating around my mind and on my heart.... i will share, promise... really i will!

i so want to share some my God-dreams that i feel being led towards, talk about the Mama's Day Out program i am starting, my thoughts on another Sister Party for the Christmas season and my complete obsession with a new holiday craft to make your home fantabulous!! and even if you never stop by again, just know this:

you were hand-crafted by the Creator of the Universe and He so wants to spend time with you today: just talking, singing, crying....He is never, ever far from His children. He's waiting for you.....

be blessed my dears!!!

the relaunch....kinda

i have been up to all sorts of things over the last month and a half since i blogged last.... i know, loser!! party of one, please! well, you'll have to get over it because i have been my own biggest critic... believe me, i write a lot of posts, many unfinished or paused mid-thought because i have to wipe a nose or vacuum up craisins or take a teen to practice or play dolls, but i have been writing none the less. so this is the unofficialy re-launch of flooded by grace, so here we go :)

oh, you thought i'd have something profound to share with you tonight? sorry, rainchecks are available.....

tonight i ask you to enjoy the cutest preschooler in all of Fly Over Country doin' some praise & dancin' to KJ52.... you'll get a good giggle and i am off the hook for the evening :)

be blessed!!!

my brave lil' man...

my sweet babe has been quite brave....

i can't imagine being the cutest 3 year old on the earth, being rushed out of your comfy bed at 5:45am (rushed because your mama was obscenely exhausted from keeping sweet 3 year old up 'til midnight so preschooler could eat & drink one last time and be extra sleepy in the morning, but not only was preschooler tired but so was mama who didn't hear her alarm go off at 5am...whew!), taken to a big strange building with everyone fussing over you, mama trying to get your superman shirt off....

i didn't get his superman shirt off until he saw me in my scrubs or "funny clothes", so then it was okay to change into his gown...

...pinning the sweet boy down to adminster his "happy juice" before being rolled down to surgery holding room wasn't the best memory for cute boy... but he anestieologist said i had "great form" and asked if i could come back to help get that down some other kids, too.... i declined, i'll stick to forcing meds down just my own children's throats

my handsome lil' man is rather dazed at this point and is holding on to me like grim death.... we had the bestest nurses taking us to surgery and that assisted our wonderful doctor, dr.p... she was so gracious to offer to snap a few pictures of us on the way down the hall

i was so thankful for the chance to walk him all the way back to the OR and hold him until he drifted off to sleep...

my blessed boy had his giant tonsils, infected adnoids removed and ear tubes put in, for the second time... praying this solves the ear infection, hearing loss, can't sleep, sleep apenia, snoring problems

thank you Jesus for watching over him, for bringing him through surgery like a champ!!!

our house is now a haven for ice cream eating, popsicle licking, pudding devouring, smoothie sipping... and for the most part 'K's doin' fantastic!!

first and ten! and 2 wins!!

we've had a lot going on this past week, much of it had to do with football, and i'm totally okay with that! i love football!! my Man is a very blessed husband in this regard :)

the best game i attended this week had to be tuesday night's game where my son was the focus of my attention...

if you can see the number 32, then that's my boy, but quite honestly when i went back to edit the pictures i couldn't tell which one was him... i know, i'm a loser, but at least i snapped some photos!

i was mightly disappointed that i couldn't find my cowbell before we left for his game, there can't ever be enough cowbell :) however that didn't stop our team from winning the game!

yep! the boys pulled out a victory, 16-12, so we are undefeated!! and he had a great time, had a great run, lots of tackles that put a stop to the offense, and i was a very pleased mama because he so thoroughly enjoyed himself!

...but i was a rather exhausted mama for my boy's game, especially after the 3 hour drive we had just taken from the football game we were at the night before...

oh ya, baby!! my Man and i took a mini-vacation monday & tuesday and headed for kansas city to watch the chiefs opener for monday night football...

it was awesome!! did i say i love football?! i do! and i love going to an nfl game, it is an impressive experience, and arrowhead was electric!!

we got up to KC early enough to head to dinner with some great friends we were meeting at our hotel and then it was off to the stadium to tailgate out with a few (tens of) thousand of our closest friends!

i had such a splendidly fantastic time spending the evening with my Man and also hanging out with our friends...

we made the long jaunt towards the stadium and stopped for a quick pic in front arrowhead...

it was about 8:15p and the gates were flooded with crazy fans and the screams of chiefs fans all around!!

since it was opening night and monday night football and the stadium has been completely overhauled (and it was magnificent!!! i was awe-struck!) there was quite a show planned before kickoff with fireworks to boot!

i was texting pictures to envious 'P' and Girlie, who were watching it all on television

and i was never so thankful for the chiefs to pull out a win, no matter how sloppy it was, it was still an wonderous end to a glorious day with my Man....

but i was ever so tired as we climbed into our bed at the hotel just shy of 2am.... i don't even remember the last time i was up at 2am unless it was to care for sickly kiddo! it was even better to sleep in past 6am :) we stopped to eat the most fabulous breakfast on our way home and did i mention how we had such a great time being together on our little escape?! it was beautiful...

and as a bonus our team won... the chiefs, just in case you were wondering