he takes my breath away....

I’ve seen “those” movies…. You know the ones with overly romance guys, whoo-ing the girl with extravagant surpises: he’s standing in the doorway with flowers waiting to whisk her off on romantic jaunts, every moment planned just for her.

I giggle at these scenes in movies because it does not depict the typical, everyday life of the married couple. Not because the husband is a self-absorbed jerk or the wife is undeserving, but life is busy with jobs and the home and the kiddos and church and extended family and blah, blah, blah…. You know where I’m headed, right?!

And I am not a woman who shies away from acknowledging her birthday (today is my birthday, just fyi…), I am completely comfortable with my age of 33 and loving every (almost) minute of it. The Lord has seen fit to give me another breath, another day, another year in which to live each glorious, gifted moment to His ultimate Glory…. And I had big plans for today, BIG! The kiddos just started spring break, so we had the whole day to hang, enjoy the beautiful weather, maybe go out for dinner when my Man got home from work, it was gonna be wonderful.

Then the completely unexpected occurred……

He went for Man of the Decade today (ssshhhhh….nobody tell him that he had already won it, hands down!!)….. It was right out of a movie…..

A knock at the front door about 10:00am…. I open it to find him, my Man, my utterly wonderful husband standing at the front door holding 18 gorgeous roses (in all the most magnificent colors)!! We embrace, we kiss…..

I stammer something about how he should be at work and what’s he doing and these flowers are gorgeous and you are wonderful and joy rolls down my cheeks…..

This Man takes my breath away sometimes

He has arranged for someone, my sister (in-law), to be my ‘lady-in-waiting’ for the day, they will arrive at 11:00am to head to the first of many (many is an understatement) schedules appointments, just for me….

Could this possibly be real?!

I’m a bit off kilter, but so excited as he tells me to go get changed and he’ll take all the kids (I was babysitting today, so it wasn’t just ours…..)

The kids are all giddy and excited at this change in schedule and my Girlie wants to know Mama is going to go do and jealous because big brother ‘P’ was in on the secret all along, and ‘K’ is hugging and chanting “Happppppyyyy Ber-day, mama!!”

But this Man, just smiles big, hugs me tight, tells me how beautiful I am, how much I deserve this, enjoy and soak in all his love and he’ll see me later tonight…. An entire day?! Into the evening?!

I am whisked off to lunch at one of my fav places with my fav people, then to a spa for an afternoon of hair clipping, finger painting, back rubbing, then to one of my most coveted stores for shopping at my mama’s expense (happy birthday to me!!!!), to dinner, to more shopping, to a fabulous boutique expo, to one more gift revealed, then at the late hour of 8:30p I walk in the door of my home, my haven, arms laden with gifts and overflowing with grace….

And this final gift caused the joy to well up again… all my kiddos and this awesome Man of mine with candles lit singing and beaming and pictures frames with a special message for this monumentally blessed mama

I find words inadequate to describe how my heart is spilling with thanks for a Man who would take the time, precious moments to plan a day like this for me…every detailed laid out. It’s not the money he spent or even the gifts themselves, but to know that He took time to think about how to care for me in a way that we simply just don’t take the time to do much, takes my breath away. He sacrificed time and resourse to invest in surprising and pampering me, loved on me in such a profound way by going out of his way and saying “you first, my love”…..

So blessed….so blessed

stumbling blocks and direction

there are so many things i want to do and yet i become my biggest stumbling block...

...you don't have time

...the finances are there right now

...what if you fail and everyone knows you failed

...i don't even know what the next 7 steps should be to get from "here" to "there"

...what do i really have to offer

i don't like to struggle, to be without vision and answers, whirling thoughts create a vortex of unknowns into an ache

He is doing something in me.... i desire to do great things for Him and that very desire is from Him to begin with

but which "great" thing should be the focus? where would you have me look, Lord?

so His Word falls open before me and tells me to look to only Him, serve only Him... devotion and obedience brings blessing and wisdom and protection...

i continue to commit His word to my heart. the one and only commitment i've planted myself upon for this new year.... Philippians, the whole book, commit to memory so that His unspeakable joys and love, a whole book-ful will grow and blossom within this life of mine devoted to His

it's a start. a wonderful one, excitement abounds!!

but He has more, much more. still listening and seeking so i can stay on His path, so His righteousness blankets me against the stumbling blocks...

i pray this first month of the year has you seeking and yearning for His direction, this journey of faith and following Christ into 2011 together in this small community.... Lord, let your grace flow and overwhelm me Jesus with your Joy and Love, that all be for your Glory

feel free to open up and share where the Lord is taking you this year and how i might join you in praying for direction and favor...

favor...

oh, yes! i crave and need His favor! presently and for the narrow path ahead of me... don't we all

be blessed, dear one!

imperfection

i am completely imperfect and messy

i don't clean my house as much as i should

i tend to do the laundry, lay out the laundry, but struggle with putting away the laundry

sometimes dinner is organic peanut butter & jelly sandwiches

i yell at my daughter for whining about her outfit, reminding her to have a Spirit of gratitude for clothes...where is my Spirit of patience...

i can't walk into my oldest son's room without commenting on how disgusting it is

it is the 12th of january in 2011 and i've yet to write down my goals

do i have goals?...what dreams has God given me...where should my focus be this year, month, day...

i let my preschooler play computer games for an hour so i could make beds, pick up rooms and hang up my Man and i clothes (only taken me 2 weeks & mulitple loads)

in all my messiness, floating adrift in my heart and mind for the last few weeks, maybe months, the Lord is still speaking to my soul...

"I love you with an unending, eternal love"

"I have plans to prosper you"

"I think you're beautiful and I want you"

"Nothing is impossible with Me, my dear daughter"

maybe you're seeking His heart for direction, wisdom, discernment, approval, dreams just i have been

feeling a bit lost

wondering what to do, where to go

even when i don't know what to do next, i do the one thing i know will bring me nearer to Him

i praise, regardless of my circumstances, my attitude

i live thankfulness, tick through the endless blessings that He pours on me

i seek to have less of me, much less

that His grace will flow over me, through me

i want be a world-changer for His name's sake

i'm just seeking how He wants to do that this year

the anticipation is wonderful and frustrating all at the same time

...help me see the glimmers of your Beauty, that i may follow after you

...steal all of me, Jesus

...my imperfections and messiness....take it all

the prison walls...

walls: (as a verb, from dictionary.reference.com)

* to enclose, shut off, divide, protect, border, etc...

* to seal or entomb (someone or something) within a wall

walls keep out the cold and rain, keep the light at bay and the hum of life is dulled to a pur in this place of solece. walls secure our countries and kingdom from predators and onlookers, alike. provided a way in and out, the wall appears to provide strength and confidence, a respit for peace on long, weary days.... free to come and go... until the wall becomes the crutch, the hiding place, no longer a place of renewal and communion with Him...

the wall is no longer there to temporary protect from the pains of life, but brick by brick our shield has now imprisoned our heart....

what happens when we refuse to tear down the stones and live in His freedom? when we no longer step outside the doors in our wall and our role in His Body is empty and dying?

the way God designed our bodies is a model for understanding our lives together as a church: every part dependent on every other part, the parts we mention and the parts we don't, the parts we see and the parts we don't. if one part hurts, every other part is involved in the hurt, and in the healing. if one part flourishes, every other part enters into the exuberance. 1 Corinthians 12.25-26 (MSG)

the wall in theory was excellent defense: using the hurled stones of pain, anger, loss, betrayal and creating the barricade with which to kneel behind, where the healing from Him could begin....

as the wall hardened steadfast strong, an eery pride joins in and the mission to go it alone with no need for others creeps along, forgeting His command... simple safeguard for the heart, right? love hurts deep and long, pouring it out over and over without allowing His love to refill and flow through brings drought and famine. going it alone behind the walls breeds dullness, when love runs dry we forget the Master's command

"Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples--when they see the love you have for each other." John 13.34-35 (MSG)

selfish wants to buffer love and fellowship with thick walls.... but then how will they see Him?!

you use steel to sharpen steel,and one friend sharpens another.proverbs 27.17

must chose-- His path: to love, sacrifice, endless compassion.... a growing love affair with the original Lover of our soul... OR the fortress of walls: emptiness, aching lonliness, separation and hardening...

by His Spirit the stones of the armament crumble bit by bit... as Light exposes our hurts, our fears...the wombly first steps to serve, to love, to live life bare and unearthed without walls

faith and trust the only real Strength needed, all that will save the soul....

you are Christ's body--that's who you are! you must never forget this. only as you accept your part of that body does your "part" mean anything. 1 Corinthians 12.27

only when the wall breaks apart can His will truly be done...

as i step out, i have failed and pulled back, ducked behind the barrier of my heart....it's quiet, i'm alone and the fear blurs my vision of Him

i stand up, knock away more stones by His beautiful grace, i will not lose my joy for prideful disobedience....

heart cries out "make me more like you" and His courage to love, to serve, to host, to dream streams through my heart

i still fail, sometimes i cower, scrabble towards the walls, but stopping short, on bended knee and arms lifted heavenward.... i believe, i know He is greater than all the pain, the hurts, the betrayals, my sins

His love is abundant and fresh, radiant sweet

if we desire to be like Him, to be the Voice of love to the grotesque blackness of the world, be the hands He uses to break the chains of sin by reaching out, out of our comfortable places, the prison walls must come down

He is greater, marvelous, glorious and bigger than my inadequecy

make us like you, Oh Lord!!! take me where you need me, break my heart for your Kingdom's calling

is He calling you to leave your fortress and trust that He will sustain you heart?

the relaunch....kinda

i have been up to all sorts of things over the last month and a half since i blogged last.... i know, loser!! party of one, please! well, you'll have to get over it because i have been my own biggest critic... believe me, i write a lot of posts, many unfinished or paused mid-thought because i have to wipe a nose or vacuum up craisins or take a teen to practice or play dolls, but i have been writing none the less. so this is the unofficialy re-launch of flooded by grace, so here we go :)

oh, you thought i'd have something profound to share with you tonight? sorry, rainchecks are available.....

tonight i ask you to enjoy the cutest preschooler in all of Fly Over Country doin' some praise & dancin' to KJ52.... you'll get a good giggle and i am off the hook for the evening :)

be blessed!!!

first and ten! and 2 wins!!

we've had a lot going on this past week, much of it had to do with football, and i'm totally okay with that! i love football!! my Man is a very blessed husband in this regard :)

the best game i attended this week had to be tuesday night's game where my son was the focus of my attention...

if you can see the number 32, then that's my boy, but quite honestly when i went back to edit the pictures i couldn't tell which one was him... i know, i'm a loser, but at least i snapped some photos!

i was mightly disappointed that i couldn't find my cowbell before we left for his game, there can't ever be enough cowbell :) however that didn't stop our team from winning the game!

yep! the boys pulled out a victory, 16-12, so we are undefeated!! and he had a great time, had a great run, lots of tackles that put a stop to the offense, and i was a very pleased mama because he so thoroughly enjoyed himself!

...but i was a rather exhausted mama for my boy's game, especially after the 3 hour drive we had just taken from the football game we were at the night before...

oh ya, baby!! my Man and i took a mini-vacation monday & tuesday and headed for kansas city to watch the chiefs opener for monday night football...

it was awesome!! did i say i love football?! i do! and i love going to an nfl game, it is an impressive experience, and arrowhead was electric!!

we got up to KC early enough to head to dinner with some great friends we were meeting at our hotel and then it was off to the stadium to tailgate out with a few (tens of) thousand of our closest friends!

i had such a splendidly fantastic time spending the evening with my Man and also hanging out with our friends...

we made the long jaunt towards the stadium and stopped for a quick pic in front arrowhead...

it was about 8:15p and the gates were flooded with crazy fans and the screams of chiefs fans all around!!

since it was opening night and monday night football and the stadium has been completely overhauled (and it was magnificent!!! i was awe-struck!) there was quite a show planned before kickoff with fireworks to boot!

i was texting pictures to envious 'P' and Girlie, who were watching it all on television

and i was never so thankful for the chiefs to pull out a win, no matter how sloppy it was, it was still an wonderous end to a glorious day with my Man....

but i was ever so tired as we climbed into our bed at the hotel just shy of 2am.... i don't even remember the last time i was up at 2am unless it was to care for sickly kiddo! it was even better to sleep in past 6am :) we stopped to eat the most fabulous breakfast on our way home and did i mention how we had such a great time being together on our little escape?! it was beautiful...

and as a bonus our team won... the chiefs, just in case you were wondering

how cheap can you be :)

it is a constant mission to save money around our home, how 'bout yours? same goal? i thought as much.... but it's hard, why am i subconsciously drawn to the more expensive items?! a strict budget is hard and the decision to live debt-free and below our means is a daily adventure is self-control.

about two years ago my Man wanted to take over the money-managing for our family, and you know, i wasn't so happy about it. even though i knew i wasn't doing the very best job saving or budgeting, i felt like if he came in and took over i'd lose some sort of "power".... stupid, huh? we never argued over money and everything got paid (for the most part) and we had more than enough money to blow on whatever we wanted, but because we weren't on the same page as far as saving or investing or spending and without any real goals, it just wasn't working.

so i submitted to his leadership, prayed for God to give me heart to follow and that He'd give my Man much wisdom and discernment to manage the money that God blessed us with.....

and that made all the difference!

in order for me to stay home full-time there was going to have to be sacrifce (i've written about sacrifice/charity here), to be able to be used by the Lord in new capacities and give like never before, it would mean paying off doctors bills quicker, paying off those credit cards and not using them again and downsizing every area of our life.... and being open to my Man's leading and the Lord's each step of the way.

and since we've done (with God's good grace) those things, and we absolutely have taken to the teachings of dave ramsey & the total money makeover, i'd like to say that budgeting and saving money and just sometimes going without has become second-nature by now, but it's not, not even close.... is living below your means easy for your family? or do you even budget?

i spent a lot of time at the beginning of the year cataloging groceries prices from about 5 local grocers,

just so i'd have a more exact idea about what was really a sale when the weekly ads came out; plus i have become addicted to couponing!! seriously, it is a personal mission to save as much as possible with my ad prices and coupons. and this isn't easy, comparing prices, figuring is this coupon really a better deal at this store because they double or at this store with a lower original price, and so on. that reminds me i probably need to catalog prices again, you know, just to make sure things are still about the same and i'm not missin' a deal :)

what makes me really proud is to same that i have cut my bi-weekly grocery budget 110.00 so far! that's an extra 220.00 each month, that for some reason hasn't necessarily ended up in our savings account due to doctor's visits, car repairs, flooded houses, and summer utility bills....

and there's another place i'm trying to cut: energy costs. and this seems about impossible!! but i have grown to love my inherited clothesline that came with our new home!

i thought i would struggle with crunchy, stiff clothes (which i loathe!) but i have taken to another money-saving tip!! instead of using all those costly stain removers and fabric softeners in our washer, simply pour in about a 1/3 cup of plain white vinegar in with your detergent, and i also use a bit more in my fabric softner dispenser. once it's rinsed out and dried, you don't smell any vinegar at all, promise! but all my sheets and towels are just right and fluffy as i'm taken 'em off the line. perfect!!

and not only do i enjoy baking, it is a money-saver!! baking cookies, biscuits for dinner, brownies, pizza crusts and the like from scratch is better for you and much more efficient on my grocery dollars.

example: my homemade drop biscuits are a bajillion times better than any store biscuits from a can and so easy:

2 cups flour (one unbleached white and one whole wheat)

3 tsp baking powder

1 tsp salt

combine and then using a pastry cutter or a sturdy fork work in a 1/2 stick of real butter (and don't melt or soften it, the cold butter is perfect and melts beautifully while cooking in the oven, yum!). once it's all crumbly stir in 1 cup milk and you're done!!!

have your oven pre-heated to 450, and just drop the dough onto a baking sheet lined with parchment paper, it makes about 7-9 biscuits depending on how big you like your biscuits :), and 12 minutes later you're in biscuit heaven!

this recipe is quick, healthy (for a biscuit) and super cheap!!

okay, i know there are other ways we have been pinching pennies, but i want your input and ideas, or at least help me feel better and let me know that you struggle to control your spending and it's not just me :).... please.....

so a happy friday to you and have an amazing weekend; if you stop by tomorrow evening i'll have some thoughts about remembering 9/11, should be interesting or at least i think so :)

be blessed

Cast your burden on the Lord; and He will sustain you.... Psalm 55.22

a peek into my week...

i know, i know, it's only been forever since i last posted.... sorry.... we get busy around here and i literally go days on end without opening my laptop. i am totally determined to not let this happen anymore, even if all i'm writing about is what i made for dinner and the strange dreams i had the night before :) maybe y'all can help interpret some of them, because the dreams have been getting weird! i need to drink some calming green tea before bed or something!

has it been raining for like two weeks where you're at? i swear i am done with rain!! this is just one of the reasons why....

yes, after two days of record rainfall last week, we had about 3 feet of water under our home, a backed-up sewer system and me have a little stress-attack! you can understand, right? when you have five people in the house and the toliets won't flush, well i'll just let your imagination and nose go from there.

but 97.50 for a plumber to work 20 minutes and fix the problem (and oh my goodness! that is a career path i am thankful i never considered!! gross, gross, gross!!!) and 84.00 for a sump pump, we were on the road to getting everything back to normal by last friday afternoon. and we were incredibly thankful for my brother (in-law) who hauled over a HUGE pump from his work to get the water out from under the house much faster!! and the mammoth puppy and Big 'K' had the time of their lives playing in the water that was leaving the house and now flooding the yard!

i promise that the water wasn't contaminated or anything, but it made a terribly muddy mess of my already soggy yard and my neighbor wasn't exactly please that the run off was puddling up her yard (again) too.... but what can ya do?!

what else?..... oh! my babe, Masta 'P', is just days away from his first jr. high football game!! we are soooooooo excited and pumped for him! he's had 2 1/2 hour practices every day after school, so he's ready. and he got the jersey number that he had desperately been praying he'd get....

my other brother (in-law) is the number 1 high school running back in the state (he holds 5 state records! but he's in college now... i digress, sorry) and 32 was his number, and 'P' really wanted to have that number in jr. high and in high school, too. and we were all really excited, too! it was an affirmation to him but me as well, that nothing we pray and give to God is too small or insignificant; if it's important to us and something that's on our heart, the Lord is so faithful to hear us...

i love to bake from scratch. mostly i want to control what is going into our food, but baking/cooking is theraputic to me, is it that way for you? my bestie (ms.s) teases me about making my pizza crusts from scratch, like when i say "it's really not that hard or a big deal" and she says "well not if your martha stewart!" so i just decide to take the sideways compliment and go on about my day :)

so since 'K' and i are together all day with nothin' but time to learn, read, play, frolic, shop, clean... ahem, i got a little sidetracked.... we bake together quite a bit

he was so happy to wear mama's apron, and i am glad i snapped a pic real quick because in no time flat he was trying to yank it off with extreme prejudice! we were whipping up some sugar cookies, which are really awesome and soft, but i need to create some sweet glaze or something to drizzle over the top.... just thinking out loud :)

my glorious Girlie is doing so outstanding at her (new) school. third grade is splendid and she is making several close friends and if i haven't said it before, we just are so giddy about her teacher and what a blessing she is!

as we walk to school in the mornings, we walk right past a locally owned donut & coffee shop, and it smells incredible, delectible, scrumpitous!! so i got us out the door just a little earlier than normal this week and surprised Girlie with a little detour into the shop for a donut (or two). she smiling from ear to ear and loved the treat!

don't you just love surprising your kiddos with special treats like this? my kiddos treasure the most simple memories like this and the moments of talking over a sprinkle donut.... i love 'em

i've had several orders of Jewelry Portraits (from my design business, Flooded By Grace Designs) and they've been custom orders and that has been truly a treat for me to create them!

here's one i did for a little girl who needed a portrait for her growing necklace & earring collection plus something to hold her beautiful hair bows...

it was a double stack of frames with gorgeous satin ribbon and buttons flowing from the bottom to clip hair bows on.... i loved it and lil' Girlie was a bit more than jealous for it! i am still working on my website, it's a much longer process than i anticipated, plus i'm trying to get my inventory (jewelry portraits and such) built up and ready for orders, but customers can always make a custom order request... just sayin' :) if you're interested just drop me a note!

and before all the sogginess, 'K' and i have enjoyed some cooler, fall-like days at the park...
...isn't he just beautiful?! wow...

and he was racing just as fast as he can up and down the ramp on the equipment. amazingly he didn't bite the dust... praise the Lord :)

"peek-a-boo, mama!!!"

okay, so this is a peek of what's going on in my world.... i promise, cross my heart to be back tomorrow with something profound to say.... or at least something amusing to say :)

love ya!

be blessed!

and then there were two...

has it seriously been over a week since i wrote last?! wow! how lame can i get?! please do NOT answer that, really don't....

i have a totally good excuse for not writing: it was the first week of school!!! this has been huge! Mr.'P' is now officially in junior high and playing football (whoa!) and lil' Lou-Woo Girlie started third grade at a new school here in our quiet town, Fly Over Country, USA (she's brilliant!) and this has been quite the adjustment for Big 'K' to do preschool each day at home and no bubba or sissy... then there were just the two of us....

the evening before school started, i stole the big kids after dinner for a special treat

did you know that it's the little things that kids remember? the little walks down the street and seemingly simple conversations, the snuggles and holding of little hands are the moments that they remember, not the gifts or pricey gadgets. i know this because my posse would tell you that one of the best times ever was eating ice cream at sonic when they crawled through the moon roof and ate on the roof of the truck. and this was like 2 or 3 years ago. crazy, huh? so i drove 'P' and Girlie to sonic for 99 cent sundaes (yum-o!!) and i let them create another memorable moment :) on the roof of the truck in their pj's...

and i'd like to say that i got a picture of my eldest before i was allowed to walk halfway to the junior high with him, but then i'd be a liar instead of a completely forgetful and silly mama who has broken her streak of first-day-of-school pictures.... however that walk to school on monday was magnificent! i was so excited that he let me walk with him and i was kicking myself after i quickly hugged him and gave his fuzzy head a rub that i forgot my sunglasses to cover my teary eyes as i headed back to get my Girlie ready for school, too.

she wanted to walk to school, as well. this is the first time we've ever lived close enough to do this and it is apparently the coolest thing ever to walk to school!! (giggle) so after much careful preparation, she adorned herself (with some primping assistance from mama) with her most favorite new outfit and i strapped 'K' into the stroller and headed off to third grade...

i'm so a fan of this super adorable frilly, sequined skirt.... kinda want one of my own... seriously

so we headed inside..... it was an anxious moment for her, i could see her biting the bottom lip a little and so i reminded her how incredibly kind, smart, sweet, caring, fun, beautiful she is as we walked the new halls to her class. might i add she has the most amazing teacher this year, it is sure to be a wonderful success. and after five days, it is almost being to feel normal and not new... and this mama is overly relieved for God's grace in giving the right teacher and class, everything

you noticed the fabulously gorgeous school bag my daughter was carrying, didn't you? i thought so, i could sense your envy from here (hee, hee)...

yep, i made it for her.... and wow, it was one of the most frustrating projects i've taken on as of late. i wanted to throw my sewing machine about 6 minutes into the whole dang process, but after i shed a couple tears of frustration one night i persevered and came out with what she believes to be the "most beautiful bag i've ever seen, mama"... ya, that made it worthwhile

Big 'K' and i are working on the letter 'A' this week, 'A' sounds and 'A' words, also on concepts of big and small, short and tall and his very favorite: cutting on the lines!!

i am trying to finish a couple 'jewelry frames' that were ordered, and one is completed and the other is going to be done by the end of tomorrow if it kills me!! okay, it won't kill me but no one may get fed until i finish :) and i have about 5 more frames to complete so i can officially open my etsy webstore for Flooded By Grace Designs (lots of Yay!!!)

so do you forgive me for ignoring y'all?

oh, good!!! now it is bedtime for this mama who is worn out and in need of about 14 hours of straight sleep.... i do realize i'll only get about 6 but a girl can dream, right?!

be blessed.....

it's my twilight ponderings.... and a contest!!

with a new (old) home to clean & remodel, an amazing Man, three babes in my posse and never enough hours in the day to feel like i've even made a dent in my ever-mounting projects for home & kid's school, i have no right to take on some time-consuming obsession...

...but that doesn't matter because i am over-the-top hooked on a saga of books: twilight!

now don't judge me!! yes, i believe that the author wrote these books with young adults in the starring roles meant to appeal to teens and young(er) adults, well in my opinion most precisely written for women... however, after reading the first two books (twilight and new moon, just so you know) i know that this series was designed with the adult woman in mind.

okay, okay, you may not agree, but here's my thoughts:

my teenage son wants to read these books, but i am saying "no" for now because the love and passion that bella and edward express (not sexually at all, in case you were wondering) for each other is so deep and emotional, and the author did a phenomenal job of conveying the desire and engulfing love these two souls have for one another, there is no way in the world that my teenage son or daughter could even begin to process or understand that kind of love. i wonder how many adults could fathom love to strong that it consumes all of your heart, that so selfless that you couldn't imagine living without the other half of your heart...

it could have been subconscious, maybe not, but it is of course the cry of most woman's hearts to have a man that is so completely out-of-this-world obsessively in love with all of you and the author has created this guy, edward, that is so totally amazing in his protective nature and the intensity with which he loves her, bella. it is the propensity of the female heart to yearn for a man to love her with such infatuation and the early to mid-thirties woman is a prime candidate in today's society, in my humble opinion.

every girl wants those moments that makes her heart beat faster, butterflies in her stomach, to be pursued, to be protected, to be rescued, to experience passion, a love affair that is exciting....

i have stumbled with these feelings and thoughts for the last three weeks, my hunger and fascination with the storyline, you know a great book will consume your thoughts, i love that about reading... anyway, so i have this astounding marriage, not bragging and it's not without work, i can't boast about something that is all the plan and blessing and grace of God :) but even with a strong, wise, warm, sheltering and might i add insanely handsome Man, that doesn't mean that i'm not intrigued and romanced by a storyline in which the girl is shadowed by a man whose love is so overwhelming.... a woman wants to be overwhelmed, ya know? and when you're home with kiddos all day, working and juggling babes, trying to get everything checked off the to-do list, the same day in and day out routine, all the heart-pounding drama has settled into monotony....

is it wrong to say that i miss being purused? while i would never, ever, ever trade my life, this beautiful blessing.... but i love this story because it reminds me of the first time i saw my husband, i remember our first kiss, what it felt like when he took my hand for the first time, how i used to get butterflies when i saw him across the room, how much i missed him when we were apart, when i realized that i would never be able to live without him....

i think this story, the movie, lots of other stories and movies too, place false expectations and desires into the hearts and minds of girls and woman, expectations and fantasies that the majority of relationships can't ever live up to.... that's why it's a story, but i am still drawn to it for the simple fact that i can't resist an amazing love story that highlights the good and bad in people, how when we truly give ourselves to someone how much power we are giving them to edify our soul or break it....

i could keep going, i do truly love twilight.... you know you wanna love it too :)

this story, these characters are appealing to me, so very appealing.... but i don't think i'm the only thirty-something wife & mama. so i refuse to tolerate you're giggling that i'm completely ravenousness with these books, take the step pick it up the next time you're grocery shopping, seriously your can buy these books anywhere.

hhhmmm... if you haven't ever read the books then i have a contest.... now this is totally off the top of my head.... tell me (reader's digest version, please) your love story, good or bad. i'll pick my favorite and i'll send you your very own copy of the first book in the series, twilight!!!

alright, can't wait to read your stories.... let's say this contest is on until monday morning, okay?

be blessed!!

oh, by the way, i'm team edward!!

running to and fro...

okay so besides my obvious addiction to all things twilight, and by the way i have an entire post about my thoughts on twilight and if you don't care i do understand but you are totally missing out!! ahem...... anyway, we have been busy, busy, busy here in fly over country, USA.

my big kids go back to school in only 2 weeks!! i can't believe it's flown by so quickly! so last week we took our annual trip out and about to buy school clothes and shoes and hang out...

one of the many places we shopped was the mall....aaagggrrrhhh....i despise, loathe, dread the mall. something about taking three kids of varying ages, different opinions and wants, having to go into more stores than i want just to say "no" to most things, attempting to avoid all the candy, cookie and pretzel vendors, ugh! however, they were all mostly good, okay 'P' and Girlie were, of course, good....

...but 'K' on the other hand was having a rather difficult time following directions. however he and 'P' had an amazing time riding the escalator over and over and over.... and then as he bunkered himself under some shelves of jeans, his sweet sis sat next to him humming and chatting until, well see for yourself...

yep! it was way past naptime and i was totally fine with it, as least he wasn't running around pulling clothes off the rack :)

and by the way, jc penny was having an amazing sale, and no they didn't pay me to say it, but WOW! you should totally check it out...

i've also been creating several jewelry portraits for my sweet readers who won them plus a couple as gifts and i am developing a business plan and site to sell Flooded By Grace Designs... it is sure to be wonderful (i hope)...

i really liked this design with a delicate pink frame, the vintage pink roses in the background, sweet pearls with purple button accents from which to hang necklaces or rings...



and this one was a requested pink and brown palate....

and i have to say that i loved how the varying shades of pink paisley ribbon on the inside of the frame popped against the background & the frame, but i'm kinda of biased :) more importantly, what do you think? i'm really curious...

so as i prep our lives for a kid in junior high, one in third grade and lastly our little one for preschool, i am experiencing glorious anticipation about what the Lord is bringing to our lives and how He will use me... praying that He will equip me, make me worthy of the calling He has on my life.

seriously, i'm writing out my thoughts on twilight for debut tomorrow, so you won't want to miss this one....

love y'all! be blessed.....

i have a problem...

i was so excited about all i had to blog about last week!! more home videos, my thoughts about honesty, a yummy cookie recipe contest..... then i was finally introduced to the first twilight movie..

...so i had to read the first book...

...which led to devouring, in a very obsessive-conpulsive manner the second book (new moon, if you didn't know, because i didn't know 10 days ago)....

...and i'd love to write all sorts of really profound and inspiring words for you tonight....

...but i'm watching the movie, new moon, because i have all sorts of issues about how wonderful edward is...

...so we'll talk tomorrow, okay?

thanks for understanding :)

late night thoughts....

what have i accomplished & been thinking about this week? hhhmmm....

i did laundry & got it all hung up (it's the hanging it up part that bites when doing laundry isn't it)

i have swept & mopped the kitchen, dining room and living room like three times

i babysat a cute 7 month old; i played on the slides at the park with my 'K'; drew with sidewalk chalk & blew bubbles

prayed a lot; spent much time in the Word

hugged my kids; cheered as 'P' won his basketball games; typed up some blog posts but still haven't published them (can anyone say "procrastinator!"); did a little grocery shopping; sat on the front porch daydreaming about my new home

helped my Man pay bills; helped my Man cut our budget down some more; stopped at sonic for raspberry tea two times (but it was during the half-price happy hour, so it's like i only went once..)

did an Avon order while thinking ugly thoughts about the new distribution center filling my orders :) i know, i'm working on it...

made 4 beds each morning; did the dishes twice a day for several days & wondered how 5 people can possibly dirty so many dishes; polished the stainless appliances once; cleaned all three bathrooms; vacuumed just about every day

questioned my sanity on more than one occassion; argued with my oldest son about something stupid & reminded myself to let some things go

worked in some "work" but didn't really get much done with clients & decided to drop one of the three projects i work with & yet still stress over not getting enough "work" done each day

practiced numbers & counting with 'K' and his Bible verse for the week; worked with lil' Girlie on her multiplication & she achieved her reading goal for the month & explained to me that we are killing the bears by cutting down trees & i reminded her of reality instead of the progressive Earth Day agenda

i calmed my perfectionist-driven daughter that an A- in math on her mid-quarter grades was nothing to freak out about and motivated my son to get his comm arts from a B+ back to the usual A-

i kissed my Man every opportunity i got & reminded him how proud he makes me to be his wife

i asked God if i was where i was supposed to be and how i get where He wants me

i'm thinking about what God is going to do in church on Sunday, it excites me to know He will reveal the Word anew to my heart; i can't wait to teach my class of toddlers that Jesus loves them & desires their little trusting hearts plus i love craft time!

thinking about planning another Sisters Party, who to invite, worried if anyone will come, what project should we do; praying for the coughing & feverish toddler in the next room

i ended each day this week feeling as if i had done nothing! i hate that feeling! after reviewing my week in writing & reeling through my thoughts and actions i know that i did a lot... maybe it's my expectations & goals that need some tweeking

never the less, i influenced and shaped my children's hearts and minds, i held the power in my words & actions to encourage my Man & be a blessing to him...

Lord i am a blessed woman... thank you for placing me here to fufill your purpose...

it was a 'Super' day!

i love being a mama.... just check out this 'super' kid that tagged along with me the other day!! he had a cape and everything!!



needless to say, he was the talk of the town everywhere we went...




and when we had played too hard and just couldn't handle going without a nap for one second longer, big 'k' found sissy's shoulder to crash on...

i am so overly blessed with amazing kids, an awesome hubby and a gracious Lord whose compassion and mercy are bigger and more amazing than i can describe!!!

my random thoughts....

how shameful that now at home full-time i can't even find the time to post my ponderings and the activities of this Blessed household... so let me give you a rundown of my random thoughts for the last week:

i have been busy organizing my home (constantly) just in case a realtor calls without warning to show the house (which happens frequently), and while i am not trying to be a whiner (honest!) it is simply exhausting to keep the laundry down to one small-ish pile and the floor gleaming! but oh how blessed to have this home that God has provided out of His vast amounts of grace, thankful that i have a home to clean, a place to rest our head...

it is a work in progress (literally..) to find a routine that is conducive to working at home... if any of you wonderful friends have ideas for me about how to be more productive & organized, i will happily take some advice here!! big 'K' and i were out all last friday meeting with clients, talking about MLM to businesses that will benefit from reaching moms here in Fly Over Country, we had a fun lunch at the pizza place together, and while we worked late into the afternoon it was incredible to have 'K' with me (and the big kiddos were at school, just in case you were wondering :) )

i went to a really fun pampered chef party last week, i bought the coolest bamboo spoons... i know i'm nerd but i so love to cook and so i'll find happiness in the small things!! i am going to have my own party soon, probably before we move since our new home will most likely not host huge groups (but maybe it will... i shouldn't put limits on what God can provide for us, huh?)

we are still waiting (working on patiently waiting) for our home to sell... lots of buyers through to see it, and very good feedback, however nothing yet. i won't lie to you, i've had moments of worry, irritation, grumbling, faith & trust; regardless i know that i know that i know God has brought us to this place in our walk with Him and He doesn't just walk off and leave me hanging! our home will sell in His time, we are praying and seeking Him through all this, i will rejoice & serve Him no matter what, and can't wait to see His provision! (if you would like to add us to your prayer list regarding our home selling, i would be so super thankful!!)

praying a lot for little Layla Grace... my heart is broken for them, asking God to work a supernatural miracle for this sweet girl. remember them today when you praying...

'P' has been doing fantabulous in school (not that he's ever done badly, just to clarify) and really enjoying his homeroom this year. he's in the school spelling bee tomorrow morning so that's exciting... he played on two basketball teams this year, one already ended and this next week is the last week for the timberwolves (tear... sniffle). these boys have been playing competitively for a long time and since they are headed to junior high next year this will be their last games together. we had a great season and have been very blessed to be apart of this group of boys & parents. however 'P' was asked to join another competitive team for the spring and summer, so that will be a great experience and excited to see him develop his skills even more... i so love being this kid's mom!!

my lil' Lou-Woo girlie is totally rockin' it in regards to school!! she is wicked smart and an incredible reader, and she is just blowing it up. straight A's (she's always had A's, but again just clarifying:) ) and even an A+!! so proud, but you can't tell at all can you?! hee hee... she played on a basketball team this winter as well, and she improved so much from last year. she was a much better shooter and she handled the ball great! while this isn't her sport of choice, not that any is, she did a wonderful job and it was good exercise if nothing else :) Girlie isn't playing the piano right now, we're on hiatus, but it will be making a reappearance soon much to her dislike. we're trying to find a hobby or interest that she'd like to pursue & develop, other that perfecting her caring for babydoll skills :) she is the love of my heart... my little mini-me :)

here's 'K' dancing with bubba's robot (which he so loves more than all the popsicles in the world!! and that's saying a lot 'cause he loves "sicles"!)... yes he is still in his jammies, which consisted of the shirt he fell asleep in the evening before & his batman underwear... cute!! this picture will reappear later on in the teenage years as a potential source of embarassment i'm sure :)

...i am fairly certain that my eyeballs are going to pop right of my head due the amount of sinus pressure i am experiencing

...wishing there were more hours in the day to get my to-do list completed

...is winter ever going to be over?! i promise if i see one more forcast with snow or freezing rain in it, well... i might officially lose it!!

what else?.... hhhhmmmmm..... i'm racking my brain for anything else of importance i can share......

oh! 'K' decided to climb 'P's book shelves the other day.... and let's just say they might have fallen down on him. thankfully there were no injuries from the crash and i needed something new to clean up right then, so it all worked out.... except he then went downstairs and found the cinnamon & sugar shaker and proceeded to sprinkle the entire kitchen, dining room & living room with it... nice, huh?! who is supposed to be watching this kid?! geez.. but i wouldn't want to be anywhere else and i love him all the way to the rainbow & back!!

i think that's all, i do cross my heart that i'm going to complete my nutrition post this week as well as a post on how we prepared our house for sale & ways we saved money; maybe this will give you some inspiration:)

For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. 1 Thessalonians 4.16-17