the relaunch....kinda

i have been up to all sorts of things over the last month and a half since i blogged last.... i know, loser!! party of one, please! well, you'll have to get over it because i have been my own biggest critic... believe me, i write a lot of posts, many unfinished or paused mid-thought because i have to wipe a nose or vacuum up craisins or take a teen to practice or play dolls, but i have been writing none the less. so this is the unofficialy re-launch of flooded by grace, so here we go :)

oh, you thought i'd have something profound to share with you tonight? sorry, rainchecks are available.....

tonight i ask you to enjoy the cutest preschooler in all of Fly Over Country doin' some praise & dancin' to KJ52.... you'll get a good giggle and i am off the hook for the evening :)

be blessed!!!

my brave lil' man...

my sweet babe has been quite brave....

i can't imagine being the cutest 3 year old on the earth, being rushed out of your comfy bed at 5:45am (rushed because your mama was obscenely exhausted from keeping sweet 3 year old up 'til midnight so preschooler could eat & drink one last time and be extra sleepy in the morning, but not only was preschooler tired but so was mama who didn't hear her alarm go off at 5am...whew!), taken to a big strange building with everyone fussing over you, mama trying to get your superman shirt off....

i didn't get his superman shirt off until he saw me in my scrubs or "funny clothes", so then it was okay to change into his gown...

...pinning the sweet boy down to adminster his "happy juice" before being rolled down to surgery holding room wasn't the best memory for cute boy... but he anestieologist said i had "great form" and asked if i could come back to help get that down some other kids, too.... i declined, i'll stick to forcing meds down just my own children's throats

my handsome lil' man is rather dazed at this point and is holding on to me like grim death.... we had the bestest nurses taking us to surgery and that assisted our wonderful doctor, dr.p... she was so gracious to offer to snap a few pictures of us on the way down the hall

i was so thankful for the chance to walk him all the way back to the OR and hold him until he drifted off to sleep...

my blessed boy had his giant tonsils, infected adnoids removed and ear tubes put in, for the second time... praying this solves the ear infection, hearing loss, can't sleep, sleep apenia, snoring problems

thank you Jesus for watching over him, for bringing him through surgery like a champ!!!

our house is now a haven for ice cream eating, popsicle licking, pudding devouring, smoothie sipping... and for the most part 'K's doin' fantastic!!

the jar & the legos...

another strategy.....

that i am implementing....

seems to be working....

'K' really wants the new hot wheels that he gets when the jar is full of blocks...

i am so not beneath bribing rewarding my kiddo for good behavior...

to spank or not to spank...

i am the typical oldest child: type A, over-achieving, perfection-driven, always-to-be-the-leader kinda of girl... it honestly didn't take much discipline to get me to change my behavior, whether i was a little 4 year girlie or when i was 14....

not that i wasn't ever spanked or sent to the corner but it really wasn't necessary (well, at least i don't think... better call mom... ok, she said it was necessary some of the time :) ) because simply giving me that look of total disappointment and telling me that you thought i was so much better than this, well it would just do me in! i'd drown myself in sorrow and create a plan to out do myself with goodness when the next opportunity presented itself.

however,my first or second or third attempts at "goodness" weren't ever truly good enough, because i was still harshly dealt with by my dad whenever it suited him.

his definition of "discipline and guidance" was a belt, sometimes his thick hands, and it didn't just sound scary or painful... it was scary and very painful

being a trimuphet survivor (thanks be to God) of child abuse has always impacted the disciplining of our posse of kiddos: definitely for the good

before kiddos i would have told you there would never be a case for spanking them! post-three-very-different-kiddos i would confess to you that i am an advocate for spanking... if it makes the point within a short amount of time and used appropriately.

our oldest, 'P' , never required more than 3 swats on the hiney as a toddler, that's it 3; our lil' Lou-Woo was a bit more of a challenge with all the drama that comes with having a girl :) but even then, the times she was spanked really made the point and her behavior quickly corrected itself...

however, our sweet baby 'K' is the world's most stubborn, rebellious & defiant toddler! okay he's not... i only know this from first hand experience that my middle brother (and my hubby's middle brother) is still to this day the world's most stubborn person :)

but i digress... spanking 'K' doesn't matter; he'll go right back to what he was doing the 5 seconds before i patted his rear, or giving him the "i'm really getting fed up with your behavior" tone is not long lasting either, and while the "naughty spot" (you might call it time-out) is effective for the moment of teaching & learning to say 'sorry' & talk about forgiveness, but i am still the very blessed mama of a little boy who couldn't do what he is told if i was paying him in M&Ms!!!

which leads me to begin thinking: does spanking truly work?

it frustrates me to no end that a swat on the hiney for throwing a fit in the store or freaking out at 'P's ball games is not teaching him anything (obviously)! why is my babe not connecting the dots here?! does spanking not have the short-term effect to cause my cute boy's brain to register "hey, maybe i shouldn't do that again?" have you had this issue with any of your kiddos? please say i'm not the only one... please!

all my own inadequacies & childhood memories are starting to get in the way too... i don't in any way, shape or form believe that spanking a child is abuse as long as it's not done out of anger and it gets the point across in a few short episodes... but as i've been researching & coming up with new ways to guide 'K's behavior, i find myself remembering the belt, the yelling, my confusion, and the marks that didn't go away and the internal scars that will always be there.

how can people do that to their kids? as parents we have all felt the frustration, those days that all our kids can say is "NO!" and your rapidly fraying rope begins to harshly smack you in the face, but how can people hit their kids and call it discipline?!

my dad always justified his attacks as "discipline".... i always knew i didn't want to ever become that: you know, somehow it's the victims fault or they say "you made me have to be tough" sort of thing. that's not of Christ, not even close

i am flooded by love for 'K' and he is the cutest little man... incredibly smart, funny, imaginative, cuddly, tough & sweet all mixed into a curly-headed boy.... goodness he's awesome, and what's even better he's mine!!! alright i'll share with daddy, but that's it! (giggles...)

i've been praying (lots!) that the Lord will use this head-strong, relentless & dominant spirit to change the world someday. if 'K' is this stubborn about not wanting to hold my hand in the store or so passionate about playing with my breakables no matter what i say, if that is used for God's ultimate glory, then watch out world!! he's coming to tell you about Jesus' love for you whether you want to hear it or not!!

so for now, our battle of wills is going to head a new direction; i will refuse to frustrate myself & 'K' by continuing to spank & not see any changes. i won't buy into what i know some believe which is "spank more and harder and they will eventually get it." NOPE, not gonna do it! in my opinion, that is how parents can cross the line of discipline into abuse....

what direction are we going? well, lots of attention and explaining of why there are rules & mama and daddy love you and it's our job to boss you around & teach you stuff :) hee hee!! i love being the mommy! i still like the 'naughty spot' and if the fits keep going in the 'naughty spot' then it's off to bed to cry it out there when he doesn't get his way. we are teaching him Bible verses about love & obedience... and he is able to tell me his verses, believe it or not!! and i can think of nothing better than hiding the Word of God in his heart to help change his behavior.

as a child, i always hoped that my dad would change, that if i was better that would make him nicer, i wanted him to care about my sports, look at my pictures, spend time doing fun things with me... the fact that he wouldn't made those episodes of violence that much worse

hug your kids today, especially when they are being bad, tell them how much you love them, turn off the t.v. and spend time with them... that way when we have to give guidance & discipline they will know it comes from a heart that is truly devoted to them

Lord please continue to bless me with wisdom & understanding to guide my children, so they will have hearts to love & serve you all their days. i want them to obey not just me but learn to obey you God, to develop a spirit of grace and have an abundance of wisdom from you. make me in to the mom that my children need, that i would be open to your direction & leading, that i will always love them with all that is in me, just as you would! i pray the same for every parent that reads this and is moved to serve you more Lord by loving their kids more. thank you Lord!!in your Name....amen

it was a 'Super' day!

i love being a mama.... just check out this 'super' kid that tagged along with me the other day!! he had a cape and everything!!



needless to say, he was the talk of the town everywhere we went...




and when we had played too hard and just couldn't handle going without a nap for one second longer, big 'k' found sissy's shoulder to crash on...

i am so overly blessed with amazing kids, an awesome hubby and a gracious Lord whose compassion and mercy are bigger and more amazing than i can describe!!!

it's all about the 'K' !!

i love birthdays at our house!! i am well aware that i already posted about baby Big 'K's birthday but i had to update you with the stupendous pictures of his big shin-dig with all our family and some friends.


when our family gets together for a birthday party it is no small gathering, not here!! there is usually close to 25 or more people running around the house... and it is fun, i'm exhausted afterwards, but the memories for our POK is totally worth it. and with this many people in attendance the presents for said birthday kiddo is overwhelming. the week before (if not sooner) i go through the birthday kiddo's toys and take out everything that is not played with on a regular basis to donate or throw away broken toys that have snuck back into the bins. now Big 'K' didn't have a ton of toys, just some blocks and a few balls, so he was ready for something new to destroy & jump on to play with!

mama and daddy got him his first tricycle!! and i love it, i loved it when it spoke to me at toys r us and said 'buy me!' and obviously 'K' likes it as well. for now i can push and steer him but the handle is detachable so when he is a little bigger and wiser in his tricycling, he can be let loose!

since he is so big, my Man and i thought that we should begin to introduce the idea of potty-training to Big 'K'. i saw this incredibly cutie frog potty at WM and it was only $12 so i thought that was a deal and made my purchase. 'K' immediately sat down on his froggy potty and thankfully daddy was quick with the camera, i just hope as we begin the soggy road to potty training that he's always this excited to sit on the froggy!

we are a sports-loving family! and that is really an understatement, we're addicted to all things sports, except baseball 'cause it's incredibly boring (no offense, lol), so 'K' has been magnetically drawn to all types of balls since he was able to grasp the round, rubber toys in his chubby little hands. his nana followed mama's instructions and purchased this basketball goal (good job mom!), to which 'K' said as soon as he unwrapped the box "Shoot!!!". as you can see he is thoroughly enjoying his gift.

'K' is a face-maker!! he comes up with cutest expressions all the time, especially when he knows he's in trouble and he wants to play the 'cutie' card. he had just opened a gift which included the coolest pair of shoes with Spiderman on them. and 'K' loves Spiderman, as influenced by big brother. the pic speaks for itself....

picking at our cookie and ice cream!! 'K' is not a cake loving kiddo, so i made big, giant chocolate chip with walnut cookies instead. i'll be honest with you, i love making outrageously awesome cake-masterpieces for my kiddos birthdays, and they love to see what i come up with in regards to the theme they've chosen. so i didn't have the chance to the oober-creative with the cookies but they were oh so yummy, and 'K' liked them and that's all that matters!

more cookies and ice cream... and yes you silly, it was all natural and organic ingredients in everything... now i can't say the same for the m&ms we ate with it :)

it was a great day (the 4th of July actually), so we also had an amazing show of fireworks in the backyard courtesy of daddy and all the uncles to end the evening on. can't wait to see what year #2 brings this little man of mine....

happy birthday big boy!!

happy 2nd birthday baby 'K'!!!!

it doesn't seem quite possible that 2 years have passed since i delivered babe #3 on a hot monday evening, at 6:53pm to be exact. i'll be honest with you, i wanted 'K' to just wait until the 3rd of july to grace us all with his presence; i was ready to deliver, believe me, but (and i know ahead of time how silly this sounds but bear with me, ok?) all of our birthdays are on odd numbered days... and big 'K' was about to ruin that. strike that, not ruin, but he was throwing off our whole birthday day thing!! but i was so ready, regardless of the date, and not just because i had been waddling around for 2 weeks dialated to a 5, oh yes i said "5", but he was rather content to just keep swimming around in there.

i absolutely love the pictures from the hospital hallway that ms. abbey (you rock) took of the family and especially of 'P' and 'Lou-Who'. as they kept their ears to the door, they would also slip me and daddy notes under the door. it had me laughing at some rather uncomfortable moments, and 'Lou-Who' couldn't understand why i didn't write her something back right away!

the first people in the delivery room were of course big brother and big sister. we wanted them to have the VIP treatment, and 'Lou-Who' was so gentle and loving with baby 'K', and with me: "mommy, you're okay right? are you tired?"

i was ready for Big 'K' because i felt soooo prepared and ready for this final addition to our family. baby #3, no big, right?! my bag and the diaper bag had been packed and in the truck for a couple of weeks, the nursery was ready, every piece of clothing washed in yummy smelling baby detergent (oh how i love the smell of Dreft), the big kids had painted a welcome home sign for 'K', daddy was confident in his coaching and ecstatic for our babe. but we felt a real peace and readiness (not that you can ever be fully prepared) because we had planned and prayed, prayed and planned for this baby for so long. my Man and i had originally started talking about babe #3 about two years prior, and once pregnant we kept it our own little secret for almost 4 months before we told anyone, which was incredibily special and fun for us, i highly recommend it for your next pregnancy!!

'P' took immediate ownership of 'K' and he wasn't at all nervous or anxious to hold him!




(the kiddos sign i referenced above!!) the big kids left with mema and papa to stay with them while we were in the hospital but they stopped by the house to put up the sign and they wanted to clean the house up for me so it would 'perfect' when i got home... did i say they are awesome.

here's a cute pic of the fiersome-threesome when baby 'K' was about 5 months old.... he's so fat and adorable!!

not just a little baby anymore... his 1st birthday was rainforest-safari!! and i made him a monkey cake, which he did dig into and made a monster mess. i wish i could find that pic to scan in, oh well maybe later, just use your imagination!

while this might be a strange image to share on this momentous day, but it is very 'K': he's always on the go whether he's climbing, running, exploring into areas that he is not allowed. 'K' is all boy, and i have to parent him quite differently than i did the other two at this age. 'K' is stubborn and strong-willed and he doesn't take instruction well at all, but i have grown as a mama and learned to eat some words that i've said flippently in the past about parenting a 'strong-willed' kiddo. there are been times that he has driven me to tears "why won't you just listen to me, aargghh", but i say a quick prayer, count to 5 and go again. try, try again is for parents too, you know!

anytime it is stressful at our home or things don't go according to plan the first or second time around i think many Bible verses but i do ponder upon a line in our most favorite dr.seuss book, Oh The Places You'll Go (i have the entire book memorized, it is great!):

you'll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. you'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. so be sure when you step. step with care and great tact and remember that life'a Great Balancing Act.

i agree that as a mama i'm going to get mixed up but to make my decisions with 'K', or any of my Posse of Kiddos, to do so with tact and care and prayer, and it is all about having to balance priorities.

i don't think i've really posted a pic of me with any of the kiddos, so here you go, i really do exist. i love holding my big boy and how he looks at me and trusts that mama has it all figured out... if he only knew!

and enjoy this swimming pic, 'K' is about 22months old here. he is a lover of the pool, mostly drinking the water like a dog, lapping it up while down on all fours!! who is watching this kid? oh, right, me....

dear 'K',

you are 2 today, and yet it doesn't feel like it's been two years, but that i've had you my whole life! in many aspects since you are the baby of the family i just want to keep you little, except i'd like the tanturms to stop... so if you could work that in i'd appreciate not dragging you through anymore grocery store lines (not that i did that, ahem...). i love how you want to be held all the time. now i'll admit some days it is a challenge to get everything done on my list with you on my hip, but when i stop and think about it, there will be a day not too far away that you will be too big to hold and you won't really want or need me to carry you.

you're crossing over into becoming a little boy and not a baby and it makes me sad, but i look forward to having the deep conversations with you like why the sky is blue, and why can't the fishy breathe out of the water and where is Heaven...

i love you all the way to the rainbows and i pray that the Lord continues to mold me day by day into a mama that will raise you to love and serve the Lord with all your heart. it matters very little to me if you make straight A's some day as long as you give it your best, and if you decide you don't want to play football or basketball, that's okay too. those accomplishments, while great and awesome and make me excited for you, are not the reason i love you and i will never give up on you, ever. there is nothing you can do that will cause me to turn away from you: we will disagree, you will think i'm stupid, i will most likely get angry and have to discipline you for many infractions (i say that based upon these first 2 years, and that's okay, but anytime you want to start being obedient i'm all for that, giggle), but i will always, always love you. you are a part of me and i am so blessed to have you as my kiddo and i am honored to have the title as your mommy.

happy birthday baby!

love ya to the rainbows,

mama