i love my girlie

i love this lil' girlie with all that is in me...

i love to sneak up to her bedroom door to listen to her teaching her dollies and the care with which she reads each story.... practicing for her future mothering duties

i love that she comes up to me regularly and whispers "i just feel like hugging you all the time" and i would hold her for all time it i could

i love her creativity and flare for design.... everything in her world is pretty!

i adore that she still sits and makes me & daddy homemade cards, each one specially designed, every brush stroke and sticker has meaning & passion behind it

i see her desire growing to develop her skills: be it playing the piano better or being able to dribble the ball just a little longer than last time

i memorize the moments when her eyes light up because big brother asked her to hang out with him... her desire to be his best friend & confidant is tangible.... she looks up to him

i gush over the times i hear her singing to her baby brother as they lay down to sleep, their beds just 4 feet apart... my heart leaps when i see him search for her hand as we walk to the park, he knows she'll lead him safely to the swings

i am a puddle after i witness a 'moment' between daddy and girlie, when i realize how much she loves her daddy, that he is the man in her life, he is her world... he wouldn't have it any other way, she is everything he never knew he wanted and could never live without...

i crumble when i see my faults in her, we are mirror personalities... i long to protect her from her own self doubt, her perfectionism, her shyness, her anger, her laziness... i pray harder to a great God that has, is and will give me wisdom to shape her into something a million times better that i could ever hope to be

i want the world for her

i pray that she always knows she is my love, my heart, my best friend... her beauty is staggering and her soul is even more breath-taking

she is a child of God, a daughter of the Most High King... her spirit to love Jesus is amazing and i am devoted to planting her in furtile soil so she may grow may in Christ each day

what an honor to mother a daughter... to be hand she holds for support, the arms she clings to for comfort & love, the eyes that she looks to for reassurance....

i love her so deeply that my lil' girlie will never comprehend... until one day she has the privilege to usher in a girl of her own and then she will feel the rush, the love, the pride, the beauty...

happy birthday to my beautiful girlie!!

it was 4:48am in a very cold, frigid is what my Man says, delivery room after 12 hours and 48 minutes of labor that my beautiful gift was born on Friday, October 5th in 2001.

i am absolutely in love my little girlie! she was such a blessing sent straight to me from the Lord above and i was so excited when she was finally delivered to be holding a piece of Heaven. she was so beautiful and tiny, only 17.5 inches long and a delicate 6 lbs 2oz. she was rather quiet and didn't cry much at all, except when they separated her from her mama. and when i held her for the first time, all swaddled in warm blankets with a cute pink hat on her head of full black hair, she looked at me and we were instantly in love with each other.

this must have been what it was like for my Man when 'P' was born and then with 'K', but i felt like i had this little mini-me that would want to be just like her mama, and the excitement and anticipation and weight of that hit me right off the bat.

it is funny how kids take on the attributes of their parents, and in our house that does ring true, lil' Lou-Who has lots of spunk, a voice that sounds like smurfette but with attitude and she can talk for hours about anything!!! i love that!! the boys in our happy home are usually content to give one and two word answers, grunt a little and move on: how boring! i ask lil' girlie how was school and we could be talking for the next hour. she has been this way since she was able to string together a few sounds. when she was only about 1 1/2 years old and i'd get on to her about something she would round on me and start pointing her finger and jabbering at me with baby attitude, and my response was she was blessed that i didn't know what she was saying 'cause it probably lead to a pop on the hiney!

(side note: this was want she wanted to do after school today, go pick out pumpkins!! so fun)

my girl has gotten much more shy as she grows, worried about being the center of attention but still wants to be involved, an absolute heart of gold, a deep inner desire to be the best at everything but not at the expense of others, she will help anyone, play with everyone, she is so amazingly beautiful and gorgeous on the outside like a mini supermodel but her heart is like sunshine and glitter with a love of Jesus and a soul that longs to just play in her room singing worship and reading books. no my sweet girlie isn't super athletic, unlike her mama, but to amuse me she plays basketball, well at least she runs the right direction which is all i was truly wanting :) !!!

what a privlege i have been given to raise a women after God's own heart. i am to show her how to live for God with all your heart, mind, body & soul, teach and show her what a Godly wife is all about, instill the Word deep in her heart, live out what a mama is to be and act and do. thankfully i have a huge, ever-present Savior to guide me and her.

everyone jokes that the hard years will be ahead: the arguments about clothes, boys, friends, curfew, i could go on but i don't want to, all those issues are a potential bomb zone. i mean, we already have battles over clothes, extra tv time, cleaning her room and more of the usual mom & daughter stuff. but i choose to savor the moments laying on her bed reading together, going on walks and playing at the park, painting our nails and her telling me about the 'kitty' game she played at recess and she got to be the mama kitty (giggle), watching her play on the swingset with her baby brother as she gently mothers him, or as she follows around her big brother like he's the best guy in the whole place, and as she dances on the feet of her daddy in the living room looking to him as the man she loves more than anything in the entire universe.

i love to remember how her hair looked when she was just 6 months with little pigtails sticking out the top of her head; that she used to crawl into bed with me in the middle of the night just to lay on my chest so she could "hear your heart beeping mama" and fall back asleep; cuddling her during one of her many, endless ear infections, singing gently to sooth her back to sleep; letting her put makeup on me and fix my hair and let me tell you over the years she's definitely progressed and her creative flair gives her the upper hand!

my lil' girlie, i love you so much my heart aches! God created you just for me and me just for you, forever and ever!!

happy birthday my sweet babe!!!