its officially been a lifetime since i last wrote anything on this poor blog.....
however one thing has NOT changed: i am still and forever more will be a very Blessed Mama!!!
when i last left you we were celebrating the new little life growing inside me! babe #4 is such a part of this mama's heart and soul and a faith-renewing miracle!! and i can whole-hearted yell and proclaim that from the mountain tops....
...even though our sweet babe is now a beautiful angel basking in the Glorious presence of our Lord.
losing a child, be it during pregnancy or stillbirth or as an infant, is horrific to put it nicely. it didn't help us when the head physican in the ultrasound department said that as many as 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage. i realize he was trying to help, give me sterile soliace that this wasn't my fault and it happens all the time. didn't really sit well with me, this losing my baby doesn't happen to me "all the time."
but my God is so good!!! MY GOD IS SO GOOD!!!
i kept repeating that, hypnotizing myself really, for the next few painful days. i knew it was true, God is faithful and awesome and so, so good, and i was not going to let myself blame Him or lose sight of His heart for me.
He knew what the doctor would see on the ultrasound, no surprise to Him no matter how much this surprised me.
i will hold my precious, God-crafted and designed Baby Angel someday in heaven....it will be breath-taking!!
that was the middle of may....
fast forward to today, tuesday the 9th of august 2011
this is our gorgeous baby #5...little gummi bear (this is my nickname for all our wee little babes) is 9 weeks old, perfectly squishy and healthy, developing splendidly and due to greet us in march of 2011
my God is so big, so strong and so mighty...there's nothing my God can not do!!!